Children begin by loving their parents. After a time they judge them. Rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. – Oscar Wilde
This was the Random quote of the day on my blog and while I didn't intend on writing on the topic I was so struck by this quote and a few other events of the day that this blog happened as a result.
I have to reactions to Wilde's statement. The first is simple. I love my parents. I only hope that the understand the depth of love I have for them, how honored I am to be there son. I feel like I fail to comunicate the depth of respect I have for them and the sacrafices they made to give me the upbringing I had. I think that I can never express my thankfulness to them to make the hard decisions I couldn't and doing with out so my immaturity and appetites could be appeased. I am beginning to understand that not only is this what love is about but also the struggle of being some ones child/parent. On one hand as a parent there is no end to sacrifice and no true way to be thanked. On the other there is no way that I as a son can every really give back or even begin to thank my parents for what they have done. My only hope is that by carrying on the cycle my parents might understand how much they mean to me and how proud I am to be their child.
The second thought is along the same vein but relates to how we view God. Justin McRobets (a long time favorite) has long challenged my through his writing to set in the tension between a sovereign good God and the evil that is rampant on the earth. (Check out his blog. The link is on the right! Just right click and open in a new tab.) That and for some reason Ellie Wiesel's writings came to mind. His story is a great and remarkable one but for this instance its his journey of faith that is the most pertinent. He begins life as a good Jewish boy devoting his life to the Torah and then the "night" happens and it is a long journey from despair and judgement. His memoirs are a great read.
I've learned that first stage of reconciling the "problem of evil" is that God no more needs my forgiveness then he does my permission. Because forgiveness implies that I am owed some reconciliation that I have some authority to judge. This brings me back to sitting in the tension of a good God and a broken world, sitting with a frustrated, angry and broken heart.
If I ever get past the first step I'll let you know.